23 Signs I’m in My Ego

Hi All,
Beth Green has completed writing Platform 6 of Living with Reality, which you can read by clicking here and going to page 251. 
Platform 6 is about Becoming Integrated and it is a brilliant frontal assault on the ego and its attempts to keep us feeling separate, alone and in survival. I wanted to share a favorite excerpt with you here and would love to hear your favorites as well.
This particular excerpt helps us to identify when our egos have taken over. I like to think of it as, “Twenty-three Signs I’m in My Ego.” Every time I read the list I can’t help but laugh at myself.
My favorite for today? “If my looking good conflicts with reality, reality must go.” Don’t we wish!
Love and Chi,
From Living with Reality: Nine Platforms for Becoming Ourselves:

“Here are additional thoughts, feelings or attitudes that indicate that our egos are in charge:
a. It’s all about me, and I’m entitled to throw little fits about not being respected, listened
to, or followed.
b. I’m alone, I’m different, I’m the only one who….
c. Everything has to be done my way.
d. There’s nothing wrong with me. The problem is him/her/them/it.
e. There’s everything wrong with me. I’m the worst.
f. Something is wrong, and I’m going to have to fix it.
g. Something is wrong, and I’m the one suffering.
h. Something is wrong, and it’s all my fault.
i. Nothing is wrong, if it means confronting someone or something or if it means I have to
change or lose something that makes me feel comfortable, important, safe.
j. How I look is more important than how I feel, what I contribute, or how I impact others.
k. How I feel is more important than reality.
l. If my looking good conflicts with seeing reality, reality must go.
m. I have to prove myself no matter the cost.
n. My safety comes first, even if that makes me a coward, a bully, or apathetic.
o. Poor me.
p. I’m a shameful being, who should just hide, withdraw, and/or withhold.
q. I am being put upon.
r. You don’t understand.
s. Life is stressful, and it’s not me.
t. I get into yelling matches dedicated to proving them I’m right or the victim.
u. Being right is more important than solving a problem.
v. I reinforce my ego by fighting with other peoples’ egos, instead of trying to resolve
w. My ego talks me out of fighting other people’s egos to keep me safe.

Comments 7

  1. My favorite of the day is ” Something is wrong, and I’m going to have to fix it.” I might add that even of nothing is perceived by me as wrong I am STILL going to fix it.
    Thanks for sharing.

  2. >How I feel is more important than reality.

    This comes up a lot in trading when I am tempted to trade to manage my feelings. For example, when I am feeling stressed because something is going the wrong way, or might go the wrong way, and I take a loss (or a gain) prematurely to relieve the stress. When I am tempted to do something contrary to my system, if I can remember to ask whether I am trying to manage my feelings, and if the answer is yes, then I can manage my feelings by - managing my feelings! - rather than by losing money.

  3. Today, I realized that because I have been listening to my ego and separating from my husband based upon my ego’s advice, that I had ignored something that is now costing us $750 in late filing fees with the IRS. This comes on top of my awareness that bankruptcy is a real possibility.
    My first reactions were typical egoic response: it is not my fault; of course I separated from him because he had done…… in the past, & then I felt incredible shame that I had been so stupid. Looking at the 23 Signs that I am in my ego, I see ego’s ploys clearly. I see now that my core fear is that I will continue to be dominated by my ego. This fear is because I have been given in to my ego over and over, the shame that comes up is so intense. Platform 6 has given me a glimpse of what it is like to not be dominated by my ego. I feel now that I can be accountable for my actions on a level that I could not before, because I am not so afraid of continuously giving into my ego.

    Also I see now that my resistance to Beth is not “mine” but it is my ego because my ego knows that she is supporting me to let go of its domination. My ego has told me that Beth is the enemy, and I listened to my ego many many times. Now I know that when that thought comes up, that it is my ego gasping for its survival. I can release the need to survive.

    Love to everyone,

  4. That is the tricky one when is my ego telling me to back down & when do I stand up when I should back down & vice-versa AHHH

    I notice that I tend to disappear in the face of screamers - not good.

  5. Thank you all for sharing your favorites, your insights, your process. It will help many people who read this blog. I can identify with all of your comments. I think the ego keeps us believing there is something wrong, disconnected from reality and disconnected from others. I’ll return to this “top 23 list” many times I’m sure. Please continue to share your progress! ~Christine

  6. Pingback: December Update | The Stream

  7. Sometimes if i want to know if i’m in a state of ego and i want to get my head on straight i just take 2 minutes to calm my mind and breath naturally and just be at peace for 2 minutes. I let all the feelings thoughts and emotions go and embrace stillness and peace. Thank you for this website!

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